Sorry Mr. President, my macaw is eating people but I can't get the training tapes for 14 buisiness shipping days.

Hi this is Caleb. I thought you all might like to see my newest little buddy. You better be laughing because he knows how to laugh. He is a blue and gold macaw, his name is Sinbad. He is around ten years old. He loves pasghetti. He's just like a little kid and has to have his way.
Travis is still getting ready for his mission. He reads books a lot and doesn't talk much, not that anything has changed, he loves to serve and is looking forward to going to Mexico. He's still working on his Spanish, though he's starting to get the hang of how to say, "No bueno," correctly.
Erin is lonesome and can't wait to go back to school with her friends. She enjoyed youth conference and girls "sleep in a cabin and call it camping week" this summer. Early next month she will enter her training to be a choir class president. She will lead the warmups and help the teacher. He hair is still brown. She is terrified of the macaw that she's alone with all day.
I am working a lot. I will soon be the only manager at our store. This will mean too many hours. Oh well. I got a macaw in case you didn't see. He loves me to death, quite literally. Travis and I both have scars on our arms from wrestling him away from innocent civilians, his favorite food. My dad is a little nervous around him and Erin panics every time he moves. My mom loves him and he even tried to steal her toenails because they're shiny. All my animals are okay and my bearded dragon attacked my cat the other day which was not fun. I just found out you don't know all my animals so here goes. I have two red tailed boas, both about six to seven feet long, named Achilles and Apocrypha. Achilles is a female I believe and she may be pregnant. Then I have a Dumeril's boa that is five to six feet long. Her name is Apocalypse. She is very tame. Then I have a cute little iguana named Ben, after the guy at work. He's about ten inches long but eight of those are his tale. I also have a bearded dragon as I said before. His name is Robert and he loves me a lot and doesn't like other living creatures. I also have a hingebacked tortoise named Shelly. He is shy but will run for it if you put him on our lawn. I have three female leopard geckos. They are breeders but I need a new male, cause the one I have is sick right now. I also have a vicious monitor that is just tiny now but will soon be eighteen feet long (I hope). His name is Sandy. I have a scorpion that is named TERROR. I have a meaner than heck tarantula. She is usually very nice but now she has like eighty thousand babies she is taking care of so you could see where the stress comes from. We have six little egyptian toads. The are trying to climb out of the cage all the time. Someday they'll build a tower and one will escape because will be the tower and then they will eat us. We have one tiny frog named Broccoli that will get over one foot long.
Then we have to evil cane toads named Bahutmat and Baliwood. They will get like twelve feet long and eat people for snacks. Then we have three zebra finches, two gouldian finches, three canaries, and six cockatiels. Their names are Bing, Lemmy, Peachy, Banana, and Fluffer and Nutter. Then we have two dragons I mean quakers, that are about the size of a cockatiel but more like a parrot. They are blue, Kitty and Green, Grover. Then we just got my Macaw, Sinbad. Then we have two dogs, Nelson and the more annoying Schnauzzy. We also have a cat named Tails.
My dad sleeps a lot but he loves my new macaw Sinbad, but is a little cautious around him. My dad still works hard. We have just started to help his parents, my grandma and grandpa Sorensen. They are old and need the extra attention and love. He's glad for the excuse to spend more time with them.
My mom is really busy. She likes to shop with Travis. She puts up with my bad directions when we try to go buy pets like my new macaw Sinbad. She wants school to start so Erin has something to do. She wants to come to Idaho and see you all but can't get out of her office because the door is blocked by mountains of paperwork.